My special weapon for dealing with online BS, flagging misinformation, and navigating the internet like a pro.
This piece was originally published on Medium and revised for this publication on February 28, 2025.
The choice to engage with an online post has consequences — whether we’re pro, neutral, or against the topic.
Online Voyeurs and Shit-Starters
Raise your hand if you’ve ever impulsively liked or shared something online, only to realize later it was total bullshit? 🙋🏻♂
I raised my hand. Have you?
I can say with confidence that all of us, at some point in time, have been guilty of spreading inaccurate or sensationalized information online.
Now, I'm not talking about Russian bots or Internet Trolls or the bro-y Shit-Starters, inserting themselves into random conversations, determined to prove a point, or win the argument. To those guys I say, good fucking way to spend your time, brah.
What I'm talking about happens just by going online, regardless of how engage.
Think about it, even if you consider yourself an Online Voyeur — lurking over posts and creeping the comments but never actually participating — the algorithms will elevate that content.
And your online world becomes a mirror reflecting back all the shit you spent more than a few second looking.
From Checkout Chuckles to Click-bait Suckers!
The spread of misinformation online and IRL has been a problem since the dial-up days of the World Wide Web and the absurd tabloid magazines that always made my grandmother laugh while waiting in the grocery checkout line.
But back then, we had the sense (or skepticism) to know it was all crap.
Now, we’re trigger-happy, clicking on any bullshit article or video that catches our eye. Talk about no impulse control!
The choice to engage with an online post has consequences — whether we’re pro, neutral, or against the topic.
The post we liked gets seen by more people, and inaccuracies become socially validated.
DON’T BELIEVE THE INTERNET
Misinformation travels outward in ways we don’t consider at the moment. Add some A.I.-generated content onto the flame and watch that shit spread faster than a California wildfire.
[Before anyone calls me insensitive for that comment, check out the list of resources and turn your backlash into something meaningful. Visit Resources To Support LA Fire to find a way to help those impacted by the Los Angeles fires.]
Using generative artificial intelligence (GenAI), people can quickly and easily replicate everything from your face and voice to entire articles, realistic images, and video clips.
Basically, I’m saying: DON’T BELIEVE ANYTHING ONLINE AT FACE VALUE!
We’re seriously f*cked.
The more people I talk with who don’t understand how to navigate the internet safely, what I call Standard Digital Precautions, the more I realize how unprepared we are for this moment in time.
Technology is a runaway train rapidly approaching that massive gap in the tracks, the kind you see in old Westerns, while we sit in coach wondering if there's a dining car.
Demanding social media platforms, A.I. companies, and the government to address the problem by disclosing training data, labeling content, or moderation is something, but here’s the kicker:
A.I. isn’t the problem. We are.
Our knee-jerk reactions, impulsive sharing, and reactivity are making the internet a dumpster fire of botshit and digital plastic.
3 Steps to Outsmart the Internet
If you’re ready to take a hard look at yourself and — I say this with love — be less of a digital dumbass, here are three steps you can take right now to stop contributing to the problem and start contributing to the solution.
1. Slow Down
From binging Netflix episodes to ordering an Uber or DoorDash delivery, we’ve become impatient when things don’t happen when we want them to.
We can’t stand it, the uncomfortable feeling of having to wait. We want what we want when we want it.
Technology has reinforced the expectation that everything should happen quickly. This urgency makes us anxious, frustrated, prone to burnout, and more inclined to fall victim to scams.
My suggestion: SLOW THE F*CK DOWN
↳ When you feel the impulse to react to someone’s post
↳ When you feel the pressure of responding to a text or email
↳ When something isn’t working or you feel rushed
↳ When you receive a message
Before you react to anything or anyone, imagine a commanding voice sternly saying: SLOW THE F*CK DOWN.
Unless you’re an ambulance driver or racing in the Tour de France, there’s no reason you should be rushing. Even surgeons take their time. But when you slow down, you remove the unnecessary urgency and tap back into a rational state of mind.
And I get it. My brain moves fast, and my tongue is sharp. I’ve dedicated years to creating space between impulse and action.
In conversations, I have to be very intentional about allowing for a pause after the other person speaks. Being too quick, interrupting the person, and biting back has never worked well.
So, slow down. Put the phone away. Take a deep breath. Count to ten. Go for a walk.
Whatever you need to do to shift to a speed that feels right.
Challenge: For the next 24 hours, before you respond to an email, a text, or an online post, wait 5 minutes. Use that time to sit in the feeling you’re having. Reread what they wrote. Rethink what you would write. Ask yourself if it’s necessary or a good use of your time/energy. You might be surprised how often the answer is “nope.”
2. Step Back
You know how it is always easier to help other people with their problems than your own.
Unless we take a giant step back, give ourselves some space, and try to view the situation, we will continue to struggle for solutions to our shit.
You can’t be objective if you’re too close to the drama.
My suggestion: STEP THE F*CK BACK
↳ When shit gets heavy and people get under your skin, STEP THE F*CK BACK.
↳ When you’re not sure how to respond to a situation, STEP THE F*CK BACK.
↳ When work, family, the news, or some random stranger on the internet pisses you off, STEP THE F*CK BACK.
But don’t turn away from the feeling. It’s important and deserves your curiosity.
Take all the energy you intended to use, lashing out at some online stranger (chatbot), and redirect it inward.
Challenge: Next time you’re about to react to something that pisses you off, give yourself some space to breathe. Meditate for 12-minutes, move your body to your favorite track, or go for a walk (without your phone) — anything to create a little distance from the center of the action. After you’ve had a little space and some time to reflect, decide how (and if) you want to respond.
3. Shut Up
I’m often reminded of Steven Covey’s 5th habit of highly effective people:
Seek first to understand, then be understood.
Unfortunately, social media has given everyone a platform to express their thoughts, including echo chambers and algorithms.
We want so badly to share our thoughts, be correct, and impress others with our knowledge. It doesn’t take much for things to go south.
I hate to break it to you, champ, but not everything is about you.
Think of the number of people you’ve seen online who will comment on a stranger’s post — giving their armchair expert opinion on a topic they may know very little about.
The truth has always been that you learn more when you keep your mouth closed and your ears open.
Let me offer you this final suggestion: SHUT THE F*CK UP.
There are marginalized voices who deserve the mic after being silenced for generations. Just because you read an article or saw a TikTok post on the subject doesn’t make you an expert.
Your feelings are valid, but unless someone asks you, keep all those thoughts inside to act out on the internal stage.
All you have to do is listen, with your whole body, listen.
Challenge: Next time you have a conversation (online or in-person), make it your goal to ask at least two questions for every statement you make. Keep a tally if you need to.
Be curious about the person talking, listen more than you speak, and they might teach you something new about them, the world, and yourself.
Let’s Wrap It Up!
Look, I get it. The internet is a minefield of misinformation, and it’s tempting to react to every provocative headline, comment, or socio-political critique.
But by slowing down, stepping back, and shutting up, you’re not just protecting yourself — you’re making the world online and off a tiny bit less shitty.
Slowing Down gives you time to fact-check before you hit like or share.
Stepping Back helps you see the bigger picture and engage those critical thinking skills.
Shutting Up and listening gives marginalized voices and honest experts a chance to share real expertise over the noise of uninformed opinions.
Now, take these words and go forth!
And maybe try to be less of an asshole online and in real life. You might learn something useful — something worth sharing.
REFERENCES / RESOURCES
In the four countries studied, each with its own unique technological, political, and social environment, understanding…www.niemanlab.org
Facebook itself is paying creators in India, Vietnam, and the Philippines for bizarre AI spam that they are learning to…www.404media.co
Beware the ‘botshit’: why generative AI is such a real and imminent threat to the way we live. Unless checks are put in place, citizens and voters may soon face AI-generated content that bears no relation to…www.theguardian.com
The episode features host Julie Beck in conversation with hairstylists and self-described socially anxious people about how they overcome the barriers to starting conversations and building relationships.
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